The Quest for Maleness - THE MALE PERSPECTIVE ON RELATIONSHIPS

Author: Theun Mares. Link to original: https://www.amazon.com/Quest-Maleness-Toltec-Teachings-Part-ebook/dp/B06X95BG9X/ (English).
Tags: Theun Mares, Toltec Teachings Submitted by Warriorskeep 18.06.2018. Public material.

Translations of this material:

into Russian: Поиски Мужества - Отношения с Мужской* точки зрения.. private, 91% translated in draft. Almost done, let's finish it!
Submitted for translation by Warriorskeep 18.06.2018

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THE MALE PERSPECTIVE ON RELATIONSHIPS

If we are to practise the concepts we looked at in the previous chapter correctly, then it is vital that we understand what they really mean. In this respect we have already noted that all of life is a system of relationships. However, in order to recognise these relationships for what they are, and to grasp how to work with them, let us examine what this implies in greater depth.

If we look again at the five areas of endeavour, we see that within his own private inner world, the male hunts for power in terms of sobriety, action, feeling, warmth and intent, all of which are aspects of power. In considering these five aspects it is important to remember that power is knowledge gained through experience, and that all experience arises from action. Bear in mind, though, that even refraining from action is still an action that will yield experience and therefore knowledge. Furthermore, since it is the male who initiates the act, irrespective of what that action is, hunting for power, from the male perspective, is very much in the nature of calling forth experience through the medium of action or, for that matter, non-action.

Accordingly, the way in which the male hunts for sobriety, or clarity, is to initiate the act of conversation. But do not take this at face value. The real reason for engaging someone in conversation is to be able to listen, in order to learn, rather than jabbering away like an idiot, or talking up a storm just because you want to be heard. You cannot possibly achieve clarity on any issue if you jabber away nonsensically, or if you always want to prove your point and be right. What’s more, the true male listens as much to what has not been said, as he does to the words that have been spoken. In other words, there is always a very good reason why people will try to avoid talking about a certain issue, and why they will become uncomfortable when the male remains silent. So sobriety has everything to do with the art of listening, and in this respect, initiating conversation can be as obvious as selective speech, or as subtle as not saying anything in order to elicit information.

Action for the male is centred primarily around his duty as the provider. Yet once again this should not be taken at face value. Although the male does provide food or money, remember that he also provides the lead, the direction, and the method to be employed. Therefore, here again we see how important it is for the male to learn to act rather than react, for all of his action must be based upon his ability to discriminate between that which is life-supporting and that which is not. His every decision and move must be geared towards enhancing the quality of life, and supporting the evolution of awareness.

Feeling is the art of entering the unknown. By learning to listen to his gut feel, the male, like the female, listens to his heart in order to use the irrational knowledge called forth through his interaction with the unknown. Remember that the unknown is exactly that, the unknown, and therefore in facing anything which is unknown, the mind is useless. The only way we can handle the unknown, is to feel our way in the dark by using the gut or the intuition. However, because the female will always take the male lead, one way or another, it is vitally important for the male to initiate the act of opening the heart. If he does not do so, but instead puts the focus on the mind, the female, in taking his lead, will also listen less and less to her heart in an effort to become ever more rational and logical.

Warmth is the art of nurturing, which, from the male perspective, is the act of initiating dating and marriage. This is a concept which has become so distorted through time, that it is today very badly understood, if at all! The real implication here is that nurturing, for the male, is his ability to draw upon his knowledge of intelligent co¬operation for the purposes of fertilisation. To grasp this fully, realise that we cannot nurture something we do not have. If it is a garden we wish to nurture, we must first have that garden. If it is a child we wish to nurture, we must first have that child. If it is a hope we wish to nurture, we must first have that hope. And if it is your purpose you wish to nurture, you must first know what that purpose is. But for the male to have a garden, means that he must plant the necessary seeds. To have a child means that he needs to impregnate his wife. To have hope means that he must impregnate his inner female with the seed of hope. And to know his purpose, he must “fertilise” the world around him through the process of intelligent co-operation, so that his purpose can be brought to birth, that is, made clear.

Because the male does not have a womb, he can only bring something into existence through the process of intelligent co-operation, or, in other words, through the fertilisation of the female, irrespective of whether this is his wife, his inner female, that greater female: the world, the soil in his garden or his business. But clearly, just as the male has to nurture the seeds he has planted if he wishes them to grow and to flourish, so too must he nurture his family, his business, his hope, his dreams and, in short, his sense of purpose.

Therefore nurturing for the male does not stop at fertilisation, but is rather an ongoing commitment to his endeavours, to his purpose, to his life, and ultimately to the world and to life in general. Consequently, when the true male makes the decision to nurture something or someone, he commits himself, not just to the purposes of fertilisation, but for life. Clearly, this is a huge responsibility, and since it rests squarely upon his shoulders, it is always the male who initiates the act of dating and marriage. Needless to say, this also should not be taken simply at face value, for as should be clear by now, the true male will date his garden, his hope and his sense of purpose, in the same way as he would date his wife-to-be. Furthermore, once he has committed himself to that garden, that hope, that purpose, and that woman, he is married to each of them for life!

From the above it should not be difficult to see that intent for the male means initiating the sexual act for the purposes of creation. But here it is important to remember that any true act is in reality a sexual act, in that it culminates in creation, whilst anything that is a mere reaction only culminates in reproduction, or more of the same. This principle holds true even when two males are working together, for although one male cannot impregnate another male, they will be able to inspire each other through the process of intelligent co-operation. That inspiration is to “all intents and purposes” a “conception” or, more precisely, the joint arousal of the male’s creative urge, so that each will impregnate his own inner female. This is something we saw in the example of the Wright brothers working together towards creating air travel. So when he is co-operating with the female, intent for the male is very much the urge towards the fertilisation of his individual purpose as a creator. But when he is co-operating with another male, intent for him is inspiration in the true sense of the word, that is, initiating the sexual act within the process of life so that to “all the intents and purposes” of the greater whole he be-comes a co-creator by fertilising the womb of the unknown.

If we search a little deeper, we can glimpse a vital truth, which is that intent and masculinity are virtually synonymous forces. Yet, more than this it is not possible for me to say in a book of this nature. In time all will stand clearly revealed, but it is impractical to reveal information that cannot be utilised effectively in the life of the average man. Humanity is still a long, long way away from being able to grasp the true secret of gender, and therefore, concepts such as the hermaphroditic nature of man, the relationship of the void to its fringes, and self-fertilisation, are keys to creation that go far beyond what average humanity can grasp, much less utilise, at this moment in time. Furthermore, since creation and destruction are two sides of the same coin, and taking into consideration humanity’s present tendency towards wantonly destructive behaviour, it is necessary to be prudent and to leave these keys unrevealed for now.

So let it suffice to say that in hunting for power within his inner world, the male be-comes the product of his intent. By way of a hint to those who have the eyes to see, this means that by tapping the power of the void, the man be-comes the male. We see a taint reflection of this stupendous secret in the development of the physical body, for as soon as a boy starts to ejaculate, his body begins to change into that of an adult man in three principal ways. Firstly, he starts to develop muscle; secondly, his voice breaks; and thirdly, his testicles drop. The implications inherent in this threefold change are as follows.

Firstly, upon the level of the physical plane, the adolescent boy now develops the strength and the muscle needed for action, that is, the act of hunting. Secondly, his voice is becoming resonant with the earth’s vibration, meaning that he can now begin to sound his purpose within the act of creation. Thirdly, creation has become possible only because the creative power of the void is now available to the adolescent boy, meaning that this power has been freed for tapping, in the same way that his testicles, by having dropped, have become “freed” for use and, as a result, have started producing sperm.

With respect to the hint I am giving here, it is also worthwhile to note that the pitch of the male’s voice, when it is fully developed through correct breathing and training, is the frequency at which he taps the power of the void, and it is therefore also that pitch which determines the quality of his creations. It should therefore not be at all surprising if I tell you that the secret to both creation and destruction lies in the male’s ability to modulate pitch, physically, emotionally and mentally. The vibrational frequency of our physical planet is F major, and therefore when the man be-comes the male, it is because he has learned how to harmonise his individual pitch with that key, and has set his intent upon creation for the purposes of evolution. From that moment on his “sperm” is fertile, and all his actions are modulated to the key of F major, for this is the ultimate form of intelligent co-operation upon our planet.

The hint I have given contains an extremely valuable tool for those with the eyes to see, and especially those in the fields of education and medicine. But although such information is invaluable, you do not need to be in possession of it in order to become a true male. Just as it is instinctive for a duckling to walk into the water and to swim, so too is it instinctive for the man to “walk” into his masculinity and be-come the male, simply by changing his “pitch.” What holds men back from doing this, is their view of the world. Therefore, to use an old cliche, “Just drop the pitch, man. Just “drop” it!” Do you get the message? Listen to yourself speaking, and listen to the world around you. You already have all the knowledge you need right now, and you are constantly being given more and more guidance.

When he hunts in the outer world for the power that leads to freedom, the true male looks upon education in its broadest possible sense as being the art of recapitulation. This implies the necessity not only to recall, but also to correlate all of our life’s experience into one meaningful whole that we can rightfully term knowledge, or power. In this respect, recapitulation is vital for the acquisition of sobriety, since it essentially constitutes the respect of the male, that is, his ability to re-spect all of his world and his life.

Politics has everything to do with what I like to term the art of stalking, irrespective of whether it is someone else we are stalking, or ourselves. By stalking, I am, of course, referring to manipulation, except that I like to differentiate between plain manipulation and stalking. Plain manipulation is an act which is designed so that only you are going to win, and for your own self-centred purposes, whilst stalking is an act designed so that both you and your opponent can win.

Through stalking you still get to win, but not at the expense of the other person, even though it will often be at the expense of their behaviour. For example, and looking again at our previous examples in politics, if you threaten the builder in some way into giving you a better price for your building operations, you will have manipulated him for your own self- centred gain, and this will not necessarily be to his benefit. But if you stalk the school principal into finding out why Johnny is struggling with his mathematics, which you will have done by dropping the hint about the donation versus a private teacher, the chances are that he will look into the matter. In this case you win, Johnny is likely to win, and the school principal will get his donation! Now you have stalked the school principal so that everyone wins, even the mathematics teacher, for when he is questioned by the principal as to why Johnny is not doing well in his mathematics, the teacher has the opportunity to upgrade his teaching methods.

As an example of what is meant by stalking ourselves, consider the meaning of reacting as opposed to acting. If you find that no matter how hard you try, you always end up playing the little boy, then you clearly need to take a long hard look at your behaviour. If you do this, the chances are that you will soon come to the realisation that the problem lies in the fact that you keep reacting out of habit, instead of acting in such a way that you get the desired results. To stop this pattern you will have to teach yourself to be sufficiently detached to observe every situation as if you were merely a witness. Only in this way will you have the necessary objectivity to see your behaviour patterns, to stop your normal reactions, and to do things differently. This is what is meant by stalking oneself.

Medicine from the angle of relationships is the art of erasing personal history. By personal history, I mean the you that you think you are, and that you are constantly holding up for everyone to see. In other words, your personal history is in every possible respect your self-image. But unless you can change that self-image, you are never going to have the freedom to be anything other than your behaviour! And this in turn, will mean that you will never get in touch with the real you behind all of that behaviour which comes about because of your social conditioning. Therefore see medicine in terms of healing yourself by changing your self-image.

Religion, as we discussed before, is the art of relating to your true self relative to the world at large. Religion is therefore the very core of all possible relationships, and in this respect it has everything to do with what we may rightfully term the art of dreaming. The dreaming we are referring to here is, of course, the act of nurturing, irrespective of whether this is dreaming about your purpose in life, or whether it is dreaming of Johnny getting a distinction in mathematics. The bottom line in all acts of nurturing is being able to relate to intent, that is, the desired goal, in such a way that fertilisation and creation become possible.

Science to the male is the art of intending materialisation, so that the unknown can be brought to birth within the known, through the process of fertilisation and creation. To grasp this, realise that in order to practise any of the first four arts, it is necessary for the male first of all to be-come his purpose. For example, it is simply not possible to erase your personal history if you still want to hold onto your present self-image. By holding onto your self-image you will not be creating anything new in your life; you will simply keep reproducing the same folly over and over again. Similarly, it is not possible to practise stalking anyone’s behaviour, least of all your own, if you insist on believing that you are a victim of your birth and circumstances within life. If you hold onto that belief, you will just be reproducing the same thought patterns and the same behaviour patterns that are keeping you in victim mode. So the bottom line in science is intent, centred around the materialisation of purpose, through the act of creation, and this is therefore also the core of all the qualities of personal power the male is hunting for in the world “out there.”

With respect to the above, it may help if we digress for a moment in order to look at the difference between personal power and freedom. Power, as we have already learned, is knowledge gained through experience, and therefore personal power is the knowledge we have gained through our own personal experiences. Freedom, on the other hand, is a complex concept, and not one I can explain quickly or briefly. Therefore let it suffice for the purposes of this book simply to state that freedom is the product of using personal power. But this is not all. Realise that every little bit of freedom acquired also generates more personal power, with the result that the two are like the opposite sides of the same coin, and so they are both fully interactive and interdependent.

If we move on to look at the five endeavours of the male within the outer world, we find that in order for him to be successful in those areas he needs personal power to begin with, for unless he already has a knowledge of what he is hunting, his endeavours will not bring freedom. But that initial personal power can only really be gained through the male’s endeavours within his inner private world. Only once the male has acquired sobriety, action, feeling, warmth and intent, will he have sufficient personal power to tackle the world out there in pursuit of freedom, for it is these five qualities of awareness that are termed personal power. Those who intend to study my other books will also find it helpful to bear in mind that these five qualities of awareness are what is known as the five aspects of The One Power, as expressed through the male and the female, or, its two polarities, nagal and tonal, the void and the womb.