Selfishness (Warriors' Experience)

Translations of this material:

into Russian: Забота о себе (Воинский Опыт). 99% translated in draft. Almost done, let's finish it!
Submitted for translation by Warriorskeep 16.03.2017



Theun, I am afraid I might be causing confusion with my care-less usage of words in the Living Room and that's why I wanted to ask you for confirmation of my understanding of the difference between SELFISH, SELF-LESSNESS, SELF-CENTERED, EGOIST AND EGOTIST.

I used the term "impeccable egoist" to express the necessity to serve to the SELF and put the desires of our SELF on first place in our life. This ultimately means that we need to listen to our hearts. What does protect us from listening to our hearts is the mind, or the little self, which is SEPARATIVE in its nature. So, we should be self-less, or with other words to cut off the little self if we want to hear our heart. By cutting off the little self we also can't be separative anymore, but instead we do connect with ALL LIFE and thus are INCLUSIVE. Being SELFISH eventually means the same - to devote to, or to express the SELF, but to hold the focus outwards and strive for INCLUSIVENESS. While being SELF-CENTERED means to hold the focus inwards and thus to strive for EXCLUSIVENESS. The first is expanding the SELF, while the second is shrinking it and makes it SMALL, thus the small self.

In that light, is the expression "impeccable egoist" correct, or is it misleading? And what is the difference between egoist and egotist?

Thank you.

With love and gratitude.


My friend, as always you are so very heartfelt. :) But your choice of words is somewhat unfortunate. LOL! However, I also realise that English is not your mother tongue, and so I have refrained from saying anything, knowing only too well that sooner or later your use of words will come into question. :)

Let us keep this as simple as possible, yes? Note I say SIMPLE, and not SIMPLISTIC. Life itself is very simple, but it is most certainly NEVER simplistic! :) And hence the great NEED, stressed by Toltecs over and over again, to speak and to write and to understand words IMPECCABLY. And this is because we ARE the product of our speech! I wish to stress this, for not only is this HUGELY important for each and every apprentice, but even more so for those of us to whom English is not out mother tongue. Just because it is not our mother tongue does not give us a license to speak imperfect English, or to fail to grasp the deeper meanings and the implications inherent within the subtle nuances of the English language, for if we do, how can we REALISTICALLY hope to learn?

It is therefore of VITAL importance for each and every one of you who wish to become warriors to LEARN to speak English impeccably, and to understand it impeccably. I say this because in my experience even English speaking apprentices all TOO OFTEN have a very POOR grasp of their own language. This boils down to being academically schooled, but uneducated in the true sense of the word, and even worse, illiterate! By illiterate I mean being able to read and write the words, but having no REAL understanding of the words, other than their accepted common usage and meaning. And yet words are INFINITELY more than their accepted meaning!

It is your fate in this lifetime to have found yourself an English speaking nagal, and to learn from me. And it therefore stands to reason that part of your fate in this lifetime is therefore also to LEARN to master the English language. But then this is no different for me, for English is also not my mother tongue. But my fate in this lifetime decreed that I should be educated in English, and that I impart to humanity the teachings in English. Once I realised this I made EVERY effort to master the English language. Now I am NOT saying that I know English like someone who has an Oxford degree in English! LOL! No. Instead I am saying that I make EVERY effort to understand the words I speak, to understand what effect these words will have upon the listener, and what the outcome of that effect will be. :) I HAVE to do this, for how else could I have written the books, much less teach? :)

Now that we have this background, let us project onto it your questions.

We are dealing primarily with three words, namely, SELF-CENTRED, SELFISH and SELFLESS. If you study the etymology of these words with CARE, you will quickly enough notice that they pertain to three levels of awareness, or more precisely, to three STAGES in the DEVELOPMENT of awareness. As such it follows that we CANNOT isolate one from the other, by making one more important than another, or one less important than another. No. All three stages of awareness are divine, in that they are part of the One Life progressively evolving Its awareness. How can any one of us have the audacity to proclaim any part of the Divine Plan for evolution to be good or bad? Who are we to judge the Ineffable Cause of creation and of evolution?

So then let us look at each of these three stages in a little more detail so as to understand what is entailed within each of them.

SELF-CENTREDNESS is that state of awareness in which the INDIVIDUAL is struggling to come to grips with the deeper meaning within INDIVIDUATION. What does individuation mean? It means the ABILITY of man to awaken to the fact that each human being is a divine spark of the One Life. However, because of the utter identification with form, it takes ages upon ages for the human being to become sufficiently aware that he or she is indeed an INDIVIDUAL that has a definite role to play within the greater scheme of life, other than just being SUBSUMED into his or her social conditioning, including that conditioning which makes him believe that he is his body, his mind, his career and so on.

As a result, this period of development within the human being can best be described as being a period of INTENSE INNER PREOCCUPATION with anything to do with the self. And hence the expression self-centred. But realise that for MOST of humanity this is the NORMAL state of awareness, for MOST people today are still struggling to see themselves as being MORE than just a secretary, a housewife, a good husband, a bad son, and so on. In other words, most of humanity, even though it has the ABILITY to individuate, is still struggling to achieve full individuation. Here you will note that whereas the word "individual" pertains to the PHSYICAL being, the word "individuation" pertains to that state of AWARENESS in which the individual has finally come to see himself or herself as being a unit of the One Life, and has done so through EXPERIENCE, rather than through an intellectual machination of half-baked thoughts and beliefs mostly acquired through social conditioning.

Once a human being has become fully individuated, he naturally proceeds to the next stage within the unfoldment of his awareness. In this next stage he begins to turn his attention outward to the world around him. He is now no longer merely self-centred, and therefore starts to notice that as an individuated individual he can and does have a role to play within the greater scheme of life. And so he now no longer sees only himself, his wife, his family, his house, his land, his income, his happiness, his life, but he now also begins to see how all of life around him is interconnected to him, and is therefore also interactive with him and consequently also interdependent upon him. But as you can see, the man is nevertheless still very much of the mindset that the world revolves around him, and hence the his, his, his.

But during this period of development the man slowly but surely begins to see from his experiences within life, that the world does NOT revolve around him alone, but around ALL of life. As he begins to REASLISE this, and note the word "realise," for it means that he is starting to DEMONSTRATE this upon the physical plane through his actions, he progressively moves towards becoming less and less self-centred, and more and more SELFISH. What this means is that he is now beginning to see himself as a part of the greater life around him, and what exactly his role within life is.

This period of development within the human being is best described as being a period of OUTWARD EXPANSION, in that he sees himself less and less as standing in isolation of the world around him, and more and more as being a PART, and a valuable part at that, of the greater life he knows as his world. But as this is a period of OUTWARD EXPANSION, the man would lose himself within the vastness of the Unknown, were it not for his innate sense of having to bring everything back to himself and to make it about himself. And this he does, even without necessarily being fully aware of what he is doing, by striving to understand himself as an individuated individual that is nevertheless merely a PART of a much greater life, and how best he can play his role within that greater life. And hence the expression selfish.

Once selfishness has been fully developed and grasped for what it is, the human being naturally moves on to the third stage in the unfoldment of his awareness, namely, SELFLESSNESS. This period within the evolution of awareness is best described as being a period of GRADUAL RELEASE from identification with the form, for it is within this period in the development of awareness, that the man begins to realise that there is a purpose higher than that of man. Once he has come to realise this much, man is well on his way to understanding through experience that just as there is a purpose higher than that of man, so too is he far greater than what his form reveals. It is within this period of his development that man begins to grasp the limitations of his perception and how important it is NOT to hold onto any one perception, for any perception is but his SUBJECTIVE view of an OBJECTIVE REALITY he can SENSE, but that he cannot yet grasp fully. In other words, he is beginning to get a sense for his true SELF, the nagal within that resonates with the purpose of the Nagal "out there."

From this moment on the man moves steadily forward, from step to step, and from one realisation to the next, until finally he comes to understand, again through experience, that his ONLY justification for the priceless gift of life is to be of SERVICE to the One Life, which naturally also includes himself as a unit of that Life. It is then when the man KNOWS from experience that there is no you and me, and no them and us, but that we are ALL units of the One Life, and therefore that one is not any more important than another, and nor is one any less important than another. In other words, the man becomes incapable of being prejudiced and of judging, for he now sees the Divine Purpose within ALL of life around him and beyond him. In this state of awareness he is now selfless in the true sense of the word, NOT because he has lost his sense of individuation, but because he no longer sees himself as being the centre of the universe, and therefore that life owes him.

Once this level of awareness has been achieved it is now only a matter of time before the nagal will begin to surface within his physical brain consciousness as his true Self, the Dreamer, begins to take control of the physical incarnation, that is, the Dreamed, more and more. As this process progressively unfolds, the man is slowly becoming AT-ONE with his true Self, until finally a day comes when the Dreamer takes FULL control of its incarnation, the result of which is what Toltecs term losing the human form, meaning a complete DETACHMENT from any form of identification with the form side of life. In that moment of total transfiguration, we see MAN emerging out of the purely HU-MAN.

And now I will answer your other questions. :)

You state, "So, we should be self-less, or with other words to cut off the little self if we want to hear our heart."

LOL! You cannot cut yourself off from the little self whilst you are still identified with the little self. Quite besides which, if you COULD cut yourself off you would become a VERY unstable person, for you will have DENIED yourself the full extent of your learning. And when we do this we develop GAPS in our knowledge, and gaps in our knowledge lead to instability of mind and perception.

What you are sensing that you need to do, is to LEARN to stand DETACHED from the pettiness of the little self, in order to TRY to see much more OBJECTIVELY the world around you and also within you. But realise that ALL of this is for you as of yet mere THEORY until you start to put it into practise and learn from your EXPERIENCES within life. And right now you have a VERY distorted understanding of selflessness, as you can see from my explanations above.

"By cutting off the little self we also can't be separative anymore....."

LOL! But you ARE being separative by even THINKING like this! The little self is the result of the Dreamed, which is the you you are now, being identified with the tonal, that is, the form side of life! So by THINKING that you can cut yourself off from the little self is, quite frankly, VERY confused thinking, or more precisely, what I term illogical logic! LOL! No. What is required, is to once again stand DETACHED, and to do this sufficiently well that you can begin to see that although you ARE the Dreamed, that is the little self, yet you are FAR greater than your perception of yourself allows you to imagine. Furthermore, the tonal, my friend, is AS divine as is the nagal, so before you become too excited about not being separative, look deeply at how very muddled and separative your thinking is. :)

"The first is expanding the SELF, while the second is shrinking it and makes it SMALL, thus the small self."

LOL! No, the little self is NOT the true Self having been made small. Who is making it small? LOL! The little self? No. There is the tonal, which is the Dreamed upon the physical plane, and the true Self, the Dreamer, indwells the tonal. But whilst the Dreamed remains identified with its form upon the physical plane, and does not yet see itself as being the Dreamer in incarnation, the result is what we term the little self, an ILLUSION of the reality.

"In that light, is the expression "impeccable egoist" correct, or is it misleading?"

LOL! It is thoroughly misleading! In fact your whole reasoning with respect to all of this is utterly misleading, for an egoist is an intensely self-centred person that cares about no-one and nothing, other than himself. Furthermore, the term egoist is only ever given to anyone in the NEGATIVE sense, meaning that that person WILFULLY and DELIBERATELY INDULGES in egoism, rather than LEARNING from it and moving on in the unfoldment of his awareness.

".......what is the difference between egoist and egotist?"

They are one and the same thing. The word "egotism" is merely an older word coined at the turn of the 18th century, whereas the word "egoism" was coined much later. But they are one and the same, unfortunately. :) So I hate to tell you this, but your logic concerning being an impeccable egoist, is completely illogical! RATF LMAO! But this is what happens when logic is elevated above experience. :)

Ask yourself, my friend, at WHICH stage in the unfoldment of your awareness you find yourself? :) And then perhaps go eat a goodly slice of humble pie! <g> It does wonders for the hollowness in the pit of the stomach that comes from trying to fly when you are still struggling to walk. LOL! And DO have a good, long and hard look at how very separative your thinking is. And remember, energy follows thought. So if you are thinking in separative terms, your actions too will be separative. :)

Your heart, as I have often enough told you, is in the right place! :) BUT......your mind is as prejudiced as only a separative mind can be! LOL! And in that prejudice your thinking is VERY muddled.

With much love, support and, please forgive me, laughter,<ebwg>